Redeafination.

Redeafination brings out the best of me. I cannot imagine what I would be without Redeafination. I grew up introverted. When I joined the troupe, I found that I was able to show more of myself, which I normally did not show to most of my friends and family.

I began to do crazy stuff like doing random movements, imitating people, singing out of the blue, etc.

Slowly I began to reveal myself to my best friend. We started to go overseas every year and do crazy things like wrestling each other in the hotel, dancing in public spaces and taking photos with random strangers. We also booked each other for a day where we celebrated our birthdays. She even performed with Redeafination friends at my 21st birthday as she knew that I liked KPop. I felt us getting closer as she saw changes in me. I am grateful to her for being there for me and putting up with me when I depended on her. Last time I was not open minded, and used to be quieter.

I used to be hot tempered during my secondary school and it caused me to distance myself away from my friends. After I went to ITE college, I somehow changed myself to become a more quiet girl. A lot of my friends were surprised at my changes.

One day, I went to a deaf event with my friends. I was excited as I had just turned 18 and the event was held at a club. I was amazed by the dance performance - it make me feel like want to learn to dance.

A few year later, due to my commitments, I joined Redeafination. From then, my passion for dancing slowly increased. My family, especially my sisters and brother-in-law, always supported me. They're always willing to come to our performances. There was one time where I invited my family (even my grandmother) except my parents to our dance event. At first, I was shy to ask them, but I eventually forced myself to ask them – fortunately, they didn't mind coming!

However, the performance was such a disaster due to a system problem. I was so upset and went to the toilet to cry. Not only me, but my crew members as well. I was ashamed to face my family. But my sister didn't understand why I was upset, and dismissed it as if it was nothing. I felt that they did not understand me. My group and I learnt our lesson and moved on. We decided to do better from then onwards.

I invite my family again to my concert. This time my parents attended. They said they got headaches from watching the concert due to the lighting and overwhelming atmosphere. It was too much from them. However, my sisters and brother-in-law enjoyed the performance. I always asked them for feedback after each dance. They are very supportive, and it makes me feel proud of myself. I always invite them every year when there is an upcoming performance and they're more than willing to attend. There are even a few times when my parents tried to imitate me dancing at home and it makes me laugh. I find them cute.

I make a lot of new deaf friends from different countries. I get to know them through my mutual friends, Facebook and overseas Redeafination performances. I help to guide them when they come to Singapore. Likewise, they guide me or bring me out for dinner when I am overseas with friends. I am always happy to see familiar faces that I know through Facebook, even if I have never met them before, at deaf event overseas. Although I used to be a quiet person, now I do not hesitate to greet them. I have also travelled with overseas deaf friends, which I met only few times or had never met before. Sometimes I even stay at their home for weeks. Some of my friends think that I'm crazy to stay with them, as I do not know them well. I get to know their culture and country. I also get to experience new adventures that Singapore does not have, such as camping outdoors without bathing for few days, swimming in a cold lake, attending big festivals, rock climbing and learning circus tricks, among other things.

I found my friends cool as they juggled so well. I decided to get myself a fire staff, and challenge myself to master the skill of juggling. I also borrowed their props such as pois, juggling pins and depostar, and learnt from them. Recently, I started to miss playing circus tricks, and thus I decided to make my own sock pois to save money. Sometimes I bring my pois and fire staff out. I teach my friends how to use them since they are keen to try. We have fun juggling together.
Roseanne